Thursday, April 19, 2012

An OTK Epiphany

You know those moments, where the light bulb comes on?  That moment when something just Hits you?  I recently had one of those moments while OTK.

Jase has adjusted to his 'top' position with remarkable ease.  Of course he enjoys the physical as well as psychological control he has over me during a spanking.

This particular time, Jase was teasing me by letting me hear some of the implements (remember,  we must use QUIET implements) whistling through the air, a few times before he actually delivered the strike.  The sound of this, combined with the anticipation of the actual strike would cause my body to twitch with anticipation.  He also likes to let me know which implement he is using by sliding it gently across my bottom.

The 'wonder loop' from Cane-iac is the implement that I find the most painful.  This particularly viscous implement gets the most physical & verbal reaction from me.  This obviously is my least favorite, but because of the 'positive' reaction, it is his implement of choice because he knows its 'getting the job done.'

So, here I am OTK being warmed up for a 'maintenance' spanking with a somewhat erotic tone.  I was feeling a little tender & could already feel the heat radiating from my bottom.  I knew that the warm up would end soon & I was getting a little antsy.  Displaying a bit of nervous anticipation of what was to come.

I could hear him whipping one of the implements in the air.  I braced myself, but received merely a teasing blow.  He was enjoying the psychological control that he was exerting over me.  (I do enjoy knowing that he derives pleasure from his dominant position. :-)

I felt him lay the loop across my bottom as he applied firm pressure to the small of my back.   "Wait, Wait! Why are you holding me down!?"  I tried, unsuccessfully to push myself up.  I heard that dreaded loop whistling through the air, I braced... merely a glancing blow.  He chuckled an evil toppy chuckle as I breathed a sigh of relief & my entire body relaxed I blurted out "Oh! You are just MEAN!"
"What did you say?" he wasn't laughing.
"Ummmm... I said... 'I love you, baby.'" (In my most innocent submissive voice.)
"Oh! So Now you are LYING to me?!" He still wasn't laughing.
"No, I'm not lying to you, I just...Just..." (What? I just what? What the hell was I gonna say? I knew damn well he'd heard me & we both knew I had not repeated what I'd really said.  I was just joking, but for all intents & purposes, I hadn't answered honestly.)
That's when it hit me, that is when I grasped the full meaning of my position & my slight vulnerability in that position (in EVERY sense of the word). My position as a 'bottom' & the position of my bottom @ that exact moment!  I felt a bit of a nervous twitch flutter through my body.

Damn it, Jayden!  Had I really just made a smart ass comment & then lied about it WHILE otk?!  Way to go DUMMY! (Did I mention that I am a naturally blonde from birth?)

I remained quiet for a moment, hoping maybe he would just let it go & continue.  Not a Chance...

"Well?"  He still had a serious tone & he wasn't spanking for the moment. I could feel the heat radiating from my bottom as I lay there knowing that what happened next depended solely on my actions/response.  I weighed my options with the help of a couple swats.  Figuring that he was going to spank it out of me anyway, I decided I'd be better off not prolonging the inevitable .  He wanted to hear me say it & I knew it.
"I said...'you are just mean'" I mumbled.
The anticipation of what I was about to get was killing me, & he knew it.
"What? I didn't hear you." he said, as I felt the sting of that damn loop.
"I said,  'you are just mean." I mumbled again.
 He already knew exactly what I'd said, he'd heard me when I originally said it.  He was reminding me of my position, which @ that time, I was well reminded of!
"I'm What?" he said with another strike.
"MEAN!" "Ow! Ow!" 2 more in rapid succession.
"I'm sorry, but WHAT did you say???" He asked me again.
...Sigh... Deep Breath... "I said... You are Just Mean... Mean, OK! I said you're MEAN!"
"Ohhh! you said I'm MEAN.  Ok..."
"Well, I didn't mean that YOU were mean...I just meant...Well, I hate that thing." (Shut Up, Stupid!)
"Oh, you mean this thing? You hate this thing?" as he slid it gently across my bottom, ensuring that I was well aware of how he intended on addressing my little outburst.
I couldn't help thinking to myself don't admit you hate it.  If he knows you hate it, he'll definitely use it. Never knowing when to shut up, I sputtered "I mean, I don't hate it! I just have a love/hate relationship with it.  You know? I LOVE to hate it! I'm just saying..."  Yeah, that's it. If he thinks you LIKE it, then he won't use it.
Oh, the stupid things that cross your mind when trying to save your ass! (LoL) Of course, it didn't work.

I felt him gently slide my panties down to mid thigh.  With the realization that warm up had ended & I'd gotten myself into this situation, I braced myself.
I felt the intense stinging of that loop across my bare bottom.  The strikes came in a moderately rapid succession, allowing just enough time in between for the full intensity of pain to be realized before the next strike found its target.  I tried desperately not to let the loop win, I was determined to remain quiet. That didn't happen.  I felt the 2nd. & the 3rd. without surrendering to the loop, but was it.
"OW!" "OW!"  I tried to be still, but I felt him firmly grip my waist as I tried to move away.
"OW!" "OW!" "OMG!" I squirmed & kicked my legs up.  "OW! That hurts!" I tried to move out of position, but I couldn't.  Another strike landed... "DAMN! OW!" " I'm Sorry! I'm sorry I said you were mean! I didn't mean it! OW! & I shouldn't have lied to you! I'm sorry!!!"

A few more followed, but not as intense & not with that loop.  When he was finished, he slid my panties back up & raised me gently from across his lap.
My eyes had really been opened.  This is not role play, this is not a game.  He really was going to be able to be a strong, dominant HoH!  I love him & everything about our new relationship! ;-)

What started out a maintenance spanking w/ an erotic tone turned to a BG spanking. But, hey, It's all Good!  I can honestly say, @ this point,  I understand the true meaning of letting your mouth over load your ass!
I am now cautiously aware of how often I mouth off.  I'm trying to work on it, but I'm thinking it's gonna be a bit of a painful lesson to learn.


  1. We are all guilty of writing checks our asses cannot cash.

    Great post.



  2. That was one of my all-time favorite moments--when I realized just how much Not a game ttwd is.